An SOS to SLS

It’s been a while since I’ve made an entry and this is my attempt to SOS my SLS…Stressful Life Situations.

The months of March & April have been very stressful. Looks like I’m about to ace the list that comprise the life events stress test. But thank God, I don’t have to go through a marital separation or divorce nor do I look forward to a death of a loved one.

My so-called stressful life may seem petty for some but adding it up might just be stressful enough.

1. I just recently left my previous company [2 months ago], which I’ve been enslaved for 6 months. Leaving the company was the only solution I could think of to get my life back.

2. With Friday as my last day, I started immediately with another company the following Monday. I wasn’t too excited but just grateful not having to queue again in that dreadful office elevator. With every new office environment, colleagues, role, and boss comes adjustment.

3. Two weeks ago, I had to deal with a difficult neighbor. It was way too difficult[!!!] especially when you’re dealing with a crazy [literally mentally unstable] female neighbor who threatened to kill you. Specifically, she threatened to evict me from my unit, then eventually threatened to butcher me. So much for grave threats!

4. With the way things are, the landlord and the police officers remained to be imbeciles. It’s just frustrating to know that people just don’t care whether your life is in danger and will only act on it once the grave crime has been committed. Poor me, I won’t have a share of justice should I be killed by the crazy b!+ch [pardon my French]

5. I decided to transfer to a different unit as I couldn’t bear the thought of sharing a wall with the insane. I had a hard time sleeping at night, had been very careful not to make any noises….to the point I almost murmur when I talk and watch TV with my headphones on, had to check the hallways if she’s there, and had to even ask the caretakers to escort me in and out of the building. It was a painful process.

6. I’ve got only 1 day and a half to pack my stuff which I have hoarded for the past 4 years. I only had 2 hours of sleep to re-energize myself for the following day as I plan my escape without having her notice I’m gone.

7. Here I am in my new unit, barely a few has been unpacked. I can’t even remember which boxes or containers I have placed most of the items.

8. Lastly, am I even gonna be ready in time for a house-warming and birthday party in 2 weeks?!

Let’s see how am I doing based on the Holmes and Rahe stress scale.

Life event	Life change units
Death of a spouse	100
Divorce	73
Marital separation	65
Imprisonment	63
Death of a close family member	63
Personal injury or illness	53 > check, was emotionally damaged by the grave threats…
Marriage	50
Dismissal from work	47
Marital reconciliation	45
Retirement	45
Change in health of family member	44
Pregnancy	40
Sexual difficulties	39
Gain a new family member	39
Business readjustment	39
Change in financial state	38 > check since my last pay was on hold + I recently had to shell out some money for home upgrades
Death of a close friend	37
Change to different line of work	36 > check
Change in frequency of arguments	35
Major mortgage	32
Foreclosure of mortgage or loan	30
Change in responsibilities at work	29 > check
Child leaving home	29
Trouble with in-laws	29
Outstanding personal achievement	28
Spouse starts or stops work	26
Begin or end school	26
Change in living conditions	25 > check
Revision of personal habits	24 > check
Trouble with boss	23 > check
Change in working hours or conditions	20 > check
Change in residence	20 > check
Change in schools	20
Change in recreation	19
Change in church activities	19
Change in social activities	18
Minor mortgage or loan	17
Change in sleeping habits	16 > check
Change in number of family reunions	15
Change in eating habits	15
Vacation	13
Christmas	12 > check due to the upcoming occasions
Minor violation of law	11

• Score of 300+: At risk of illness.
• Score of 150-299+: Risk of illness is moderate (reduced by 30% from the above risk).
• Score 150 & below: Only have a slight risk of illness.

Sadly, I got 304…

 

An Early “Trip or Treat” with the Dead

Myth of the Human Body

My friend & I started the day with a visit to the dead. It is indeed an exhibition of plastinized body parts in a gallery at Fort Bonifacio, Taguig. Ideal for students, to the naive and nerds like me, what’s interesting about the Myth of the Human Body are the assortment of human organs with lung cancer, enlarged heart, and among others. Make sure you have taken your meal early on before your visit. Entrance fee is at Php350 per head.

Next stop, Libingan ng mga Bayani. Since we were nearby, about 500 meters. from the Exhibition, we dropped by this creepy cemetery of unsung and famous heroes [including past government officials].

Libingan ng mga Bayani

This quiet place is disturbed by passing airplanes as it is just a few kilometers away from the Ninoy Aquino International Airport [NAIA]. The graves with passing thru aircrafts made my photo shoot seem more poetic and symbolic.

the cross over...

Afterwards, we dropped by the cemetery of the elite at the Heritage Park which is right across the road. It’s quite a boring place since there were only few graves. But it is an ideal place for families and friends to hang out, have picnic or even fly a kite with its expanse green field.

Heritage Park

And there goes my early “trip and treat” with the dead in celebration of Halloween & All Soul’s Day.

Libingan ng mga Bayani

Heritage Park

the cross over…

Myth of the Human Body

 

Nothing beats a peaceful sleep

August 2 – tossing and turning then suddenly wide awake at 2am. went out side to get some fresh air, take a leak, and drink some water. went back to the room to get my blanket and pillow and propped myself at the couch to get some sleep. guess, i finally dozed off around 4 or 5am. then was awakened by the sound of my phone alarm by 6am…just the same, still alert.

August 3 – still tossing and turning until 2 am. was awakened by weird dream… a dream of circles and numbers that repeatedly flashed… 251 and 661. what could this be? went outside again with my pillow and blanket, hoping I’d get some sleep in the couch. 3, 4, 5, 6am zzzzz… then up by 8 am with my eyes wide open with 251 and 661 in mind. these numbers messed up my mind thinking I needed a 66 to win Php500,000 in the 7-11 Bingo contest being August 3 as the last day of the draw. I hate math but my mind couldn’t stop calculating the rest of the numbers. perhaps, it may be for a lotto winning combination: 1, 2, 5, 6, 25 and 51 or for the blazing 777 of the casino slot machine [2+5], [1+6], and [6+1].

August 4 – well-rested for the rest of the night but then startled by a bad dream at 5 am. who wouldn’t be awakened by being molested by a female patient in a mental institution? it was a terrible nightmare… I can almost hear myself moaning and crying subconsciously. I failed to go back to bed and began researching about this terrible insomnia caused by my medication [Reductil] and an old Indie song I’ve learned to love… Insomnia by Cynthia Alexander. Singing: ruby, lemon and blue… tangerine, green, purple, psychedelic…. dream in universal color as I lie awake with I-N-S-O-MNIA

August 5 – the unexpected happened… I woke up at 6:15am just when my phone alarm started playing “Wake up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy…” finally, I had my peaceful sleep…I beat insomnia.

It is indeed my sleep journal as I knew I had to record my sleeping patterns so I have something to share with my doctor after a month of testing her new medication. She didn’t require it but I guess it makes it all more sane… a responsible thing to do.

photo from newyouforever.com

My sleepless nights brought me into researching about insomnia. I never thought there were different types and patterns of which:

Types of insomnia

Although there are several different degrees of insomnia, three types of insomnia have been clearly identified: transient, acute, and chronic.

Transient insomnia lasts for less than a week. It can be caused by another disorder, by changes in the sleep environment, by the timing of sleep, severe depression, or by stress. Its consequences – sleepiness and impaired psychomotor performance – are similar to those of sleep deprivation.^[6]

Acute insomnia is the inability to consistently sleep well for a period of less than a month.^[7]

Chronic insomnia lasts for longer than a month. It can be caused by another disorder, or it can be a primary disorder. Its effects can vary according to its causes. They might include being unable to sleep, muscular fatigue, hallucinations, and/or mental fatigue; but people with chronic insomnia often show increased alertness. Some people who live with this disorder see things as if they are happening in slow motion, wherein moving objects seem to blend together. Can cause double vision.^[6]

Patterns of insomnia

1. Onset insomnia – difficulty falling asleep at the beginning of the night, often associated with anxiety disorders.
2. Middle-of-the-Night Insomnia – Insomnia characterized by difficulty returning to sleep after awakening in the middle of the night or waking too early in the morning. Also referred to as nocturnal awakenings. Encompasses middle and terminal insomnia.
3. Middle insomnia – waking during the middle of the night, difficulty maintaining sleep. Often associated with pain disorders or medical illness.
4. Terminal (or late) insomnia – early morning waking. Often a characteristic of clinical depression.

Source: wikipedia

I also researched on how I could beat this sleeping disorder. But most of the natural home remedies seem inappropriate like drinking a glass of milk with honey would only lead me to higher potassium level that might cause blood clotting because I’m also taking a pill to cure PCOS.

It got me thinking, was it just stress and it’s all in the mind? Yesterday’s events and relief gave me hope… hope that I would be free soon [just 2 more days!] and eventually enjoy a good night sleep. Can’t wait to bask in the sun, sand and waters of Bohol in 2 weeks!

 

WTF! Hahaha!

I went to see my ob-gyn for a check-up and after the consultation, she suggested for me to consult a shrink! It sounded funny and scary at the same time.

And to my surprise, my healthcard provider doesn’t cover psychological cases and I would have to pay for it. Upon checking Makati Med’s Psychiatry Section, the doctor’s professional fee costs around Php1,200 per session! I might eventually go insane paying for that….sigh….

 

Recent learnings

I learned…

…that my dad’s friend has a stage 3 lymphoma when it was not so long ago when we also visited another friend, who’s mom has breast cancer. Since when did cancer become a common disease?!
…the reason why I’m having a hard time coping–adjusting. And I am happy to end it.
…that it’s not all about position and money. It’s about being happy–maintaining the balance, respect for one’s self, and sanity…

photo from ezthemes

…that watching Inception would lead me to drool over Leonardo Dicaprio but only during his Romeo+Juliet days.

photo from extramirchi

…that some reviews are overrated. M. Night’s The Last Airbender wasn’t so bad after all. Perhaps for those who haven’t seen the cartoon series would not appreciate it but it wasn’t really bad compared to Lady in the Water.

…that a python snake has ribs

photo from gallery.nen.gov.uk

…that there’s a fish which has a set of human-like teeth [Pacu fish]

…how frustrating it is to eat a possibly day-old viand from the mall foodcourt.
…that Dominic Ochoa’s Thumbs Up mini ice cream can really be tasty & fun to eat. Love the dark chocolate & avocado flavors. Though a fad, it’s good to know that small businesses like this could thrive in this challenging economy.

photo from tsibog

…that worrying about the next thing to do or place to go could be fun at times. Doing things unplanned can be sometimes very exciting…